Like I said, I’ve been in my house for too long.

I dunno, what do you guys think? If I woke up and saw this in my neighbors’ yard, I would probably be packing the kids into the car to get the hell out of Dodge. Florida does not ever get enough snow to make a snowman. If the folks across the street had that much snow, we’d be running for our lives.

But . . . if I lived somewhere, in this case, New Jersey, I’d be might impressed that my neighbors had the good taste to make a Venus de Milo rather than, I don’t know, a nasty Dolly Parton (for the record, I love Dolly Parton but she does lend herself to some serious snow-making endeavors) type of snowman. I cannot, however, imagine calling city officials and complaining!

The Venus-crafters complied with city officials and covered Venus. You tell me, I think she looks much better nekkid. The clothing totally changes the proportions of her armless little body. Makes you think, doesn’t it? Skip the Spanx and go au naturel? Let nature’s lines fall where they’re supposed to rather than impose more lines with clothing?

That said, there will be no time soon that I’ll become a clothing optional person. I’m just thinking aloud. If you want the feeling of nekkid, get some overalls and a tank top. Comfy and you won’t get a nasty sunburn and your neighbors won’t call the police when you head out to collect your mail.

I’m curious – what would you do if you woke up to a snow-Venus across the street?

1) Call the police?
2) Congratulate the neighbors on a job well-done?
3) Say nothing but take a picture to email to your friends?
4) Get some fall leaves, currently being pressed in your unabridged dictionary and cover Venus’ naught bits?
5) Take action and knock Venus down with a pick axe?

8 thoughts on “Like I said, I’ve been in my house for too long.

  1. I cannot imagine doing more than thinking “huh, cool snowman.” what the heck must be wrong with you to be that titillated by a pile of snow? wow.

  2. I'd probably walk over to take a look and admire it…then my dog would follow me and pee upon the artistic beauty. So I'd have to run back to my house and hide till spring.

    Can you tell what ultimately happens to our snowman here? Though we are on day 4 of pristine white snowman so perhaps this one will be safe! LOL

  3. I would congratulate them and take pictures for my facebook friends' amusement. But no such luck here…my neighbors have no imagination OR humor.
    My neighbors, if the tables were turned and my boys were the ones producing this art, would call the local police AND complain to village council AND tell us we're white trash – they're mean like that. 😉

  4. Definitely number three, which is what I did when some kids made the decorative reindeer in the park do nasty things to eachother this past Christmas.

    That Venus was very well crafted, and I agree – she looks lovely naked, but once that sarong went on it became apparent she needed to hit the gym.

  5. I'm pretty sure my immediate thought would be envy. I'd think, “Yeah, you think you look good but *I* have a head. So. There. Plus, I'm guessing you haven't had three kids. Anyone with no head, no kids and a personal trainer could get abs like that.”

    Then I would take a picture and tell my friends.

  6. I'd go with #2 and #3. And probably also Sabrina's #6. I think the thing is amazing, and the only way I'd be disturbed by it is if it was My son who'd made it.

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