More prom

I’m sore and tired from replanting half of the garden today – the day after I last planted we had a FULL day of torrential rain that was just too much for the smaller seeds. Sadly, I’m just as sore and old as I was the first time I planted. Happily, though, little things are sprouting. I saw a couple of wee green beans, black beans and zucchinis today. I replanted the egg plant, some of the beans and peas, lettuce, and corn. The tomatoes and peppers seem to have held up quite well, whew! And, my favorites, the sunflowers are poking up quite nicely.

As I dawdled in the garden listening to an excellent audio version of Agatha Christie’s Crooked House, Dan approached me with “documents.” How I dread dance documents! These were the papers I had to sign for him to attend the prom. The first page involved me giving his and my driver’s license numbers (???) and signing something affirming he was a student in good standing.

REALLY? Do the prom police think the kids who are not in good standing are going to say, “Oh, never mind, I’ll just skip it?” No, the kids who are not in good standing (who often tend to be very bright kids just very unmotivated or bored or immature) are going to forge those signatures and attend anyway if that’s what they want to do, right? That’s how it was a million years ago when I went to the prom. But, whatever, I filled out the paper work and gave it back to Danny.

What intrigued me more, however, was the list of “RULES” for the prom. They intrigued me enough that I washed my hands and typed them into my computer so I could share them with you now. I’ll add my comments in italics.

Dresses/skirts must be mid thigh in lenghth or longer. This seems fair enough to me.

Dresses/skirts must modestly and completely cover all private parts. OK – did we not cover this above? There are girls showing up at their proms with their naughty bits hanging out all over the place? It’s the prom. Parents take pictures and stuff.

Dresses with plunging necklines or bare midriffs are not appropriate.Again, I think we covered this in the above two rules. I do, however, take a bit of exception to the bare midriff rule. If anyone should ever have a bare midriff it’s a fit teenage girl.

Low cut fronts and backs are prohibited. My only question here is are the girls’ dresses measured by someone as they come into the dance? Who decides what’s low? What’s low for me looks awesome and tasteful on my full-busted friend.


No canes. Sadly, this rule alone has ruined the whole prom for Danny. He was building his outfit around his cane. @@ Really, have there been cane fights in Orange County, Florida lately?

Dress shirts must be worn at all times. Undershirts alone will not be tolerated.I’m not too worried about this. Since he’s been about three, Danny has understood the societal correctness of keeping his clothing on in public spaces. Plus, we live in Florida, no one wears undershirts here.

No jeans. Well, if you’re going to pay $75 per ticket, I think you might want to dress up a bit.

Tie or jacket required.I like that they give the option of one or the other, not necessarily both.


Students must remain in a standing position while dancing. I guess I’m old. Anyone else? Has this ever been an issue in your life? Mike and I are old but we still go dancing from time to time. If he ever suggested that we dance while not standing (in public), even after 20++ years, I’d punch him in the face! Prom girl: “Are you sure we’re really dancing? My dress is getting icky from the punch? Prom boy: “Oh yeah, THIS is dancing.” Isn’t this why God made chaperones?

Dancing may not be sexual in nature. Feet must remain on the floor and hands must stay off the floor. Shoes must be worn at all times. We might suggest bringing sandals, flip flops or a change of shoes. Well, I dunno. Dancing IS sexual by nature, isn’t it? That’s why it’s fun. But it doesn’t have to be icky and explicit or even age-inappropriate, does it? I’m not sure unless the prom is “Twister”-themed about the feet and hands off the floor thing. I get the no bare feet and think the suggestion for comfy shoes to dance in is an excellent one.

No standing or dancing on tables or chairs. Now, here is where the waiver about the student being in good standing might come into play. If said student works as a stripper part-time (and has, say, fallen behind in their study of calculus) they might need some counseling to separate work from wholesome-prom-fun. And, if they can’t separate them, maybe a helmet requirement would make everyone safe and happy?

No MOSHINGS or MOSH PITS. Well, sure. But, if you’re having a $75 per kid prom, you might have a really awesome band and the mosh pit will just break out because, you know, the band is so awesome and there’s no real food and certainly no open bar. Moshings (why the face?)? I’m pretty sure I’m against those.

And there you have it. The Prom Rules of 2010. It’s a brave new world, I think.

7 thoughts on “More prom

  1. It's cute that you think paying $75 a ticket would make kids behave and not wear jeans. I recall kids crabbing about not being able to wear jeans back in the dark ages of the early 80s.

    One of my prom dates (two proms trips, not one prom with a posse. although that would have been pretty badass) seriously DID build his ensemble around getting to have a cane and top hat. For the record, he also drove an orange '56 chevy with a cow skull in the back window and brown shag interior.

    One of my friends recently chaparoned a dance…and I'm thinking those rules might not be specific ENOUGH. God help 'em. Raised by wolves. Or pole dancers.

  2. Which high school is holding the dance? My daughter went to two DP high school homecoming dances with her friends and was amazed how the kids all “booty danced.” This was in 2000 and 2001, so maybe things have changed. She found it gross and frankly did not understand all the hoopla of going to the dance. Weird homeschooled kid!

  3. See, I think Animal House (a little bit lower now) and doing the gator and crazy stuff — thus, the reason for the feet on the floor thing.

    I think the rules on dresses are great — have you seen some of the stuff out there? And the parents buy it for their daughters and let them out of the house. Egads!

    The 'dance documents' just makes my head explode. Are they really going to say 'I'm sorry; we don't see your documents here in our pendaflex; you can't come in'.

  4. Simply stunning.


    Next time some dumbass asks me, with regards to finding out I homeschool, “What about the prom?” I'm going to refer them to this post.

    (expletives deleted)

  5. ummmm…. i seem to remember dancing on a table…. ooops….. that was the year I didn't have a date and had the most fun! jay

  6. LOL – you all crack me up. Deana, to be honest, I think if you pay $75 for a ticket you should be able to wear jeans if you want. Yer askeerin' me with yer talk o'wolves and pole dancers, though.

    Karen – I think it's Olympia high school (Metro West area?)? Danny's reports on Homecoming were pretty tame, maybe the list of rules helped?

    Ami, you kill me. LOLOLOL

    Joy, I'm so, so, so glad I do not have to clothe girl people. It's way trickier than boy clothing. I did see a picture of girl-that-is-a-friend's prom dress – lovely!

    Jay, does Claire know about this? 😉

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