Attack of the Teenage Mutant Ninja Locusts . . . and more scary, but true stuff

The older boys are done with their semester at the local college.  A’s and 1 B.  Yay them – I’m so proud and delighted that they are able to do so well.  But, now they’re home.  And they eat.  And eat.  And eat. It’s kind of fascinating to watch, but scary too.  I feel like if I sit still too long, they’ll start looking in my direction for crumbs or something.  
They were at a concert tonight.  Mike and Andy and I went to Chili’s!  We haven’t been to Chili’s since Mike stopped working there.  For years and years and years the boys and I all went to Chili’s about once every 10 days – just to see Mike because he was never home or awake otherwise.  😉  It was fun to be back.  Mike still knew a lot of people working there.  He went back to the kitchen (we still know the managers and they save their ice cream buckets for me to use when I make soap – bless them!!!!) and visited with all of his old cooks and dishwashers.  We ate and ate, but inevitably took home boxes with lunch for tomorrow (now today).   That is until the boys got home from their concert.  They ate before they left.  They stopped for pizza after.  And they devoured the leftovers when they got home.  (And, no, this wasn’t an episode of That 70’s Show!)  They’re just hungry every two hours. You think at some point one of them would top 150 lbs!
More true and scary stuff . . . Dan did not get the recommendation from Sen. Nelson or Sen. LeMieux for the USNA. Each senator only has five slots at the academy at any time – if he has four kids currently attending an academy, he only has 1 slot for a recommendation for that year.  The fact that Dan even got to the interview stage is HUGE.  Still, it was disappointing for him.  I’m proud that he sulked for a few hours and got to work again on the next plan.  He still has a shot at what the Navy calls Prep School if he can get all the rest of his teacher recommendations in on time.  
Plan B is the Navy ROTC.  He’s applied to five schools and for the ROTC scholarship.  It seems the more he gets shot down, the more determined he is to do this.  He’s also planning to reapply to the USNA in the spring.  Keep your fingers crossed.
Carpal Tunnel Syndrome.  Ugh.  I had this when I was pregnant with Andy.  Now it’s back.  With a vengeance – hence my sporadic posts.  I’m limiting my computer time and working the mouse left-handed – badly.  The wrist brace helps during the day, wish I had gotten it sooner.  Getting old absolutely and completely sucks.  
Old Dog Syndrome.  Double ugh.  Scout is going to be the one to finally send me to the rubber room.  She’s pushing 13.  You can see in her eyes that she’s not all there.  She’s like Aunt Bethany in Christmas Vacation only Scout doesn’t get it when I hold her chin and shout “THE B-L-E-S-S-I-N-G!!!!” at her. This is so hard for me to watch.  Scout is the best and smartest dog I’ve ever known.  It took me less than two days to house train her.  She figured out the electric fence in an hour.  She hasn’t even had to wear the collar for the fence for years and years.  I can just look at her and ask her to do something and she will.  Until lately.
We’ve had a couple of ongoing issues.  One, she is intent on trying to chew her tail off.  We’ve ruled out thyroid and allergies.  The best the vet can say is Border Collies tend to get OCD-ish when they get old and bored and too tired to do anything about being bored.  Nice.  So she wears the cone-of-shame unless someone is sitting right there with her.  
When she’s not too old and tired to be gnawing off her tail, she’s jumping into the guinea pigs’ cage and herding them within an inch of their goofy lives.  She nudges them and sometimes barks if they don’t go or do where/what she wants.  It’s weird.  
Well, it’s been cold and we had to move the guinea pigs inside.  I put them in their old spot and in the time it took me to toss in a load of laundry, Scout was in the cage, there was bedding EVERYWHERE and chaos reigned.  My final solution was to stick the pig cage under our dinner table with all the chairs and benches pushed up close to the table so that Scout can’t get in.  :::sigh::: So, now she circles the table, wearing the stoopid cone, whining and barking.  Every now and then we get the pigs out and let Scout herd them and lick them and groom them and hug them while they all nap.  In the meantime, we’re all eating dinner sitting on our knees on top of the chairs and benches. 
As if that weren’t weird enough, we put up the Christmas tree.  Really, if you think about it, what a strange thing to do.  In a house this size, we, once a year, put up a giant tree (yes, the big tree was my choice lol) right in the middle of our living space, decorate it and commit ourselves to spending EXTRA time right there around the tree which has eaten up a huge portion of the small space normally allotted to us.  It worked okay when everyone was little.  Now that 2/3 of the 6 of us are over 6′ tall, it’s kind of ridiculous.  Now, toss in Aunt Bethany . . . errr . . . Scout into the mix.  
Scout has developed a love of the Christmas tree skirt.  Every night, she follows me into bed and waits for me to fall asleep.  Then, she sneaks out of the room, burrows under the tree, taking tons of ornaments with her to drag out the tree skirt.  She leaves the tree skirt in a heap in the middle of the living room and comes back to sleep under our bed as she always has.  If she wanted to sleep with or on the tree skirt, I’d be okay with that.  But, I’m not sure what she’s doing – maybe she thinks it’s ugly?  
This morning, though, I gave up.  I moved the low ornaments higher. I am leaving the tree skirt in the middle of the living room – and it’s killing me!  I put a new nice cushy blanket in my bedroom for Scout to sleep on or drag around.  It’s not a battle I’m going to win and I don’t want to go down fighting it.  

I’m sticking pictures into this post at random so you get an idea of where and what I’m talking about  – see the pig cage under that table?  Makes you want to come eat at my house, doesn’t it.  Gah! 

5 thoughts on “Attack of the Teenage Mutant Ninja Locusts . . . and more scary, but true stuff

  1. Even though she won't hurt them, that's probably terrifying for the pigs. Because they are…not smart, they won't remember that it's the same giant monster from the last time. I made a lid to keep my cats out–I got two of those wire shelves that organized people buy at Home Depot. I cable tied them together so that when I lay them across the pen, I could lift up one side…I can't tell if that makes sense. Anyway.

    Poop on the NA. I hope he finds a way in if that's what he truly wants. Maybe he could get into St. John's and just slowly inch closer and closer to the USNA's side of the campus?

  2. I don't mean to laugh at your woes, but, gosh, that was funny! Except about Dan (glad he took it well — I hope his new plan is successful) and your wrist. Aging is a drag. But Scout and the guinea pigs? Funny! And your house looks lovely, even with piggies under the table! Bo, who is also 13 (or 14?) has apparently lost his memory. All day long he either wants to go in or out, and where ever he is, he wants to be somewhere else. Wasn't so bad in the summer, but in the winter, opening and closing the door lets out my precious heat and I get grumpy. But he is otherwise an excellent dog, and my memory isn't what it used to be either.

  3. That sucks for Danny, but he comes by the attitude honestly. None of us accept no for an answer and he'll show “them”. I love the table turned 90 degrees – even w/the pigs underneath! I could completely see Feliz-Naughty-Dog doing that with the tree skirt – it's a tactile thing… I KNOW you can relate Amy!

    The tree looks great – HUGE, but great. Love you loads, Lynne

  4. I need the telephone numbers of those senators. And maybe their addresses.

    I just want their clam dip recipe, I am not going to call them names or anything like that.

  5. 6gables, I'm with you. The pigs ARE too dumb to remember who is attacking them from time to time. I know the solution whereof you speak, I'm just scared that Scout's weight will collapse the roof, hence the dining room table.

    Melora, I'm feeling your pain right now. It's 27 degrees outside and Scout wants in when she really wants out and I'm fast losing patience.

    Lynne – the table does look good at that angle, huh? It surprised me. Textile thing, I get. Not so much with my dog though. 😉

    Ami – you're my hero! But, I won't give you the numbers.

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