I am not yet dead . . .

Though, I was sure I was a goner for a few days.  I caught the sore throat/cough/sleeping sickness times about twenty.  Yikes!!!!  I’ve been asleep for nearly a week.  It was not pretty.  It still isn’t pretty – if I stop moving, I am napping.  It is so unlike me to crash that hard.  And, still . . . 
I’ve learned in my week away from the planet that the news doesn’t matter (thought it’s nice to sleep to), we will not be paying a day more on our satellite tv beyond our contract – there is NOTHING on but junk.  When the highlights of A&E (you know, Arts and Entertainment) are Beyond Scared Straight and some other horrible reality thing, you know it’s a lost cause.  We’ll stick to Netflix on demand and dvd’s.  
During the “throes” of my illness, I had a notepad at my side and despite my raging fever, aching body and unquenchable thirst, I managed to make a list (because I love lists) of things I wanted from late night television.  Poor Mike!!!!  He got up in the morning and asked if I wanted anything.  He got me some water and came back and spotted the notebook.  I was nearly asleep again when he whispered, “Please tell me you did not order all of this stuff last night.”  I had not ordered a thing – just made a list.  Yay sick me.  Still, I wonder about the diamond-lined skillet and the Brazilian Butt Lift thing.  Oh well.  
Speaking of late-night television – what the heck is up with Marie Osmond’s lips? There is so much more to talk about, but I’m going to leave it there.  Honestly, seek out a Nutri-System commercial.  Marie Osmond is a beautiful woman, but she’s in her 50’s, right? We all know that, she has to know that.  Does she really think inflating her lips to the point that she looks like something is wrong with her is making us forget her age?  Gah!
In addition to bad, bad television, I watched simply bad television, namely HGTV.  By the time I woke and felt human, I was ready to implode our house and/or seek out horrible 20-somethings with $700,000 budgets for their “starter homes” who whine about granite counters and the need for “more space” as they wander through 4000 sq. ft. homes.  I get that whiners make “better” tv than normal people, but come on – there cannot be that many totally spoiled, unimaginative young couples running around out there, can there?  

Sorry to be gone so long . . . I am awake and ready to go again, though.  Here’s to a new year (kind of late)!  

3 thoughts on “I am not yet dead . . .

  1. I do not watch television anymore. Sometimes Eric will see something he thinks I want to see, and call me into the living room to watch a 30 second commercial, but otherwise, nope.

    I have gotten like you. All those whiny, self absorbed yuppie pukes on all the channels.

    It makes me want to do violence.

  2. I have to admit that I'm totally addicted to “Hoarders” on A & E. Otherwise, you are so right about television.

    I'm glad you're feeling better!

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