Note to self . . .

Stick to grocery shopping in the evening .

Yikes! I went to the grocery store yesterday around 11:30 am.  I only needed about five things but, of course, they involved a trip through the whole store.  This is a normal, regular, neighborhood grocery store. And, yet, at 11:30 on a Tuesday morning, it was filled with what appeared to be strippers!  I am not joking.

In every single aisle and alley, I encountered at least one very thin woman with incredibly large breasts.  Of these women, all were baring an inordinate amount of skin for that time of day and for what they were doing.  (This is saying something – I live in Florida – we’re the state known for under-dressing for everything!).  Additionally, they all had big hair and extraordinarily large, gravity-defying breasts.  Several of these woman were perusing bread prices in their cut off tank tops, Daisy Dukes and stiletto heels.  It was really weird.

By the time I got back to my car I was cracking up with visions of the “church” vans you see dropping seniors off to do their grocery shopping every now and then.  I started wondering if there was a similar van for strippers.  But, I see no reason they couldn’t just go by themselves.  Plus, the women I saw at the grocery store did not seem to know each other at all.  They were all shopping independently.  

As I was driving home, I thought I could have at least stayed around long enough to see one of them pay for their groceries.  Would it be all in singles?  ::::sigh::::

Anyway, I think I’ll stick to my evening shopping trips for now.  (And no one tell my kids about stripper-day at the grocery store, please.)

3 thoughts on “Note to self . . .

  1. Maybe it was going to be a stripper flashmob. People in flashmobs tend to wander around beforehand acting as though they don't know each other.

    Of course, the idea of a stripper flashmob sort of boggles the mind….

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