I read this post yesterday after a friend posted it on Facebook. I can mostly take or leave Facebook, but I love when I get something like that. I don’t know that the woman who wrote it and I have a lot in common, but I think, mostly, having kids – especially grown kids – gives us a lot in common. It’s a weird place to be when you don’t feel old.
I spent most of yesterday stripping and sanding the table Mike found last week. It gave me time to think. Yep. I AM an old mom. I don’t feel especially old. I don’t think I look especially old, but I’m WAY closer to having grandkids than I am to having another kid. Anymore, when (rarely) I shop for clothes, I shop mostly for comfort. The younger me did not shop that way. I’m coming to accept that gravity is going to win no matter what I do. Doesn’t mean I’ve given up, I’ve just changed what feels realistic – and good.
People keep asking what I’m going to do when Ian and Tim leave (probably spring/fall 2013). For now, I don’t know. I’ll keep homeschooling Andy at least through 8th grade (2014). I’ll indulge myself in projects I could not have even considered when all four boys were young. I’ll keep the house running and be a source of support for the kids who are not living here as well as for Mike and Andy. And I’ll figure out what I want to be when I grow up *snort*. Maybe I’ll figure something out before I have to go to all elastic, all the time.
In the meantime, I will continue to age as gracefully as I can and continue to marvel at the boys’ progress and success. (Oh, and I have a battle of wills going on with my vain self and my frugal self. I have not colored my hair in eight weeks. Gah. It’s freaky. When my hair is wet it’s dark and it is SO gray. But, by the time it dries, it looks like expensively highlighted blonde hair. It can’t last. Stay tuned.)
Tomorrow: Pictures of my newly stripped and sanded trash-picked table. I’m really pleased this far. Now to figure out how I want it to look in the end.