If I count my own run through middle school, I’m on my fifth time through seventh grade with Andy this year. That’s right, folks, I’ve “done” seventh grade five times. I don’t care where your kid, particularly your boy, goes to school, when they get to sixth, seventh and eighth grades they are struck with the stoopid stick. Even the best students stop turning in work they completed the night before. Or, if you’re one of my sons, you manage to lose your math work in the time it takes you to walk from your bedroom or the porch to the kitchen to give me the work. We do not have a large house. You have to try to lose something. And, yet, it happens. Daily. Hourly. And it makes me want to pull out my hair.
I thought with Andy I would be mellower about it all. And up until very recently, I have been. I know he will survive the stoopid years and go on to become a productive citizen. His brothers have not committed any felonies (that I am aware of) and seem to be held in high regard by their professors and employers. Still, I don’t know if I can survive it AGAIN.
In my head, I have an ideal plan. Kids in the 11-14 age range (sometimes a little younger, sometimes a little older) should go to live on a farm where they have to do physical labor all day long. Maybe a little reading and some real world math. But, mostly, they should just work the stoopid off. And, I believe that doing actual real work might the best way to do this. After their stint on the farm, their brains will be back (well, most of their brains) and you can return them to regular school.
So, now, I’m just looking for a farm family to adopt Andy for another year or so. Any takers? He’s fairly large, strong and will do just about any chore. Additionally, he’s funny and likes animals and small children. However, if you have more than one chore in mind for him, write the list on his arm (or backwards on his forehead) because his short term (by short term, I mean five minutes) memory is not the best.