Poor Mike . . .

In my last post, I complained about Mike and his insane middle-of-the-night/early-morning routine. He’s being trying really hard after I jumped up and down like a little kid.  He’s even accepted that I’m serious about him moving into the boys’ bathroom.  It’s been wonderful (for me, at least) and I’ve told Mike this several times.  However, I think when someone like me who is not a screamer or jumper or tantrum thrower by nature suddenly throws a tantrum it can have lasting effects on the tantrum-ee.

A couple of mornings ago, I heard Mike get up and quietly shut the door.  I smiled and rolled over ready to sleep.  The last thing I waited for was Mike opening and closing the front door repeatedly as he made his multiple trips to the truck with all of his stuff for the day. (It drives me insane, but I choose the hills I am willing to die on.  Sort of. Honestly, if you KNOW you’re going to make multiple trips from the kitchen to your car – a short trip in our house – why not just leave the freaking door open because, you know, it’s not even 5AM????? Ahem.) I heard the first closing/slamming of the front door.  I waited.  Nothing.  After about five minutes, I gave Mike a little high five in my head for figuring it all out and started to doze. 

I heard a thump as I was just falling over that edge into real sleep.  I figured it was a book getting kicked out of one of the boys bed or the clumsy dog.  But, then I realized I was really thirsty.  I padded out to the kitchen, no lights, no glasses to get a glass of water.  As I was walking back to the bedroom, the front door cracked open and a giant shadowy figure appeared in the doorway.  I asked, “Is that you?” guessing it was Mike coming back for his compass or something.  No answer.  Mind you, I cannot see past my wrist without my glasses.  I’m standing there trying to figure out what to do next.  

Never fear, Andy to the rescue.  Andy walked into the hallway, snapped on the light and proceeded to tell Mike off.  Andy is not an angry person. Andy is not a yeller.  I just stood there, unseeing, with my mouth open. Mike just nodded, turned around and went back to his truck.  By the time I turned to look at Andy, he was back in bed.  I was fully awake and fully confused.  

I tried sleeping, but that didn’t work.  I read for a bit and finally just got out of bed.  When Andy got up, I asked him what all the yelling was about.  Turns out, Mike has not figured out how to get all of his stuff out to his truck in one trip.  Mike made his first trip out to his truck and locked himself out of the house.  Fearing my wrath, he opted to break into Andy’s room.  He got the window open, forgetting there is a small love seat in front of the window.  Cally, the idiot dog, sleeps on the love seat.  Andy rolled over at 4:45 am to see a giant shape wedged between the love seat and the window and Cally, frantically licking the shadow’s face.  The thump I heard?  Mike managing to shove himself over the love seat to the floor.  He had managed to scare Andy to death and pissed him off as well. 

What I witnessed when I went to get my water was Mike sneaking into the newly unlocked front door to collect the rest of his stuff.  I don’t know if he thought ignoring my “Is that you?” question would put me at ease and send me back to bed or what.  

But, we’re all learning and growing.  We’ve learned that Cally absolutely sucks as a watch dog.  She never even left her love seat.  We’ve reinforced what we already knew, Andy and I are NOT morning people. We’ve also learned it’s probably time to invest in new windows.  I’m not sure what Mike’s learned – I think he’s only more afraid of us right now. 

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